God damn I could watch Colbert impersonate Alex Jones and his preposterous mannerisms for HOURS on end.
I wonder how many takes it requires for Colbert to get through this without bursting out into laughter. Let’s do a little litmus test — I want you to read the following out loud without at least cracking a smile:
That’s why I stick to patriot brands like Yoplait and Stonyfield YoKids Squeezers, not that Activia stuff. They’re out forcing Jamie Lee Curtis to poop — she doesn’t want to do that. Pooping is a choice! She’s a woman! And I know woman, because I remind you, I slept with EVERY woman named Debra in the Western Hemisphere!
George Soros doesn’t want you to know the real value of yogurt — that it’s a natural, protein-rich, gamma ray-shield to keep The Clinton Foundation from reading you’re dreams!
Those are merely four sentences in this sketch. FOUR! Back to back to back to back. He goes from children’s yogurt to Jamie Lee Curtis’ poop to sleeping with women named Debra to the Clinton Foundation reading your minds in less than a paragraph.
So I’m going to assume this took at least 5 to 7 tries before Colbert was able to churn this out without breaking character because this is legitimately hilarious, genius comedy writing right here.
And don’t forget to invest in Square Space. No, not the web hosting company, but the portable, cube-shaped cage where Tuck keeps the alien who insists they’re neighbors.