Hope For World Peace — Middle East Sets Record In Tissue Paper Use

Bathroom Tissue Manufacturing

Here’s great news for everybody concerned about world affairs, since it seems that the world is uniting over the incredibly civilized act of using tissue paper. In fact, tissue paper consumption is growing across the geographic region that spans Russian and Turkey and Middle East. Some areas have even seen a growth rate between 8% and 9% every year. [photo: Jeff T. Green/Getty]

This is particularly good news for Turkey, which has become a major player on the global tissue player stage. The region is demanding so much tissue paper that exports from the United States have reached a real peak. That means civilization is on the rise–but, how will the turmoil in the Ukraine and Syria and Iraq affect the tissue paper industry?

Well, that’s why they’re having the Tissue World Istanbul Conference at the end of this month. There will be over 200 attendees from 33 countries addressing how tissue paper will be affected by the uncertainties in the Middle East and Russia.

Meanwhile, we’re going to specialize with a toilet paper cabal that will probably end up ruling the world, so you better start being nice to us. That, or we’re going to start investing in corn cobs. We’re not sure which will be better, but we’ve already put in an offer for the rights to the Delsey Bathroom Tissue brand. We won’t even have to make new commercials…

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