Brothers Celebrate $75,000 Lottery Win With Meth & Marijuana, Accidentally Blow Up Their House

You’ve just won $75,000. What do you do? Buy some methamphetamines and marijuana to celebrate, of course.…

Mike | February 19, 2013 12:30 pm

5 Sad Winning Lottery Stories To Make Powerball Losers Feel Better

You’re probably feeling a little down right now because the lottery ticket you’ve ripped to shreds and set on fire didn’…

Danny Gallagher | November 30, 2012 1:15 pm | 3 Comments

lottery

The 5 Funnest Ways To F*ck Up Your Life GUARANTEED!

As many of you know, the Mayans have explained that we’ve got less than a year to live. Why not go out in style? A great barometer of your partying should be the following: even if the Mayan-theory goes the way of the Rapture (i.e. revealed to be total cockamamie horsesh*t)** your life should still be over in a year. To get a great headstart on the beginning of the end, you should take our advice and try to do at least three of the five things you’ll find after the jump!

Wyatt | December 27, 2011 3:30 pm

lottery

What To Do If You Win the Lottery

Last night, a couple of lucky schmucks from Idaho and Washington had the numbers 4, 8, 15, 25, 47, 42 and won the Mega Millions jackpot. They will share a $355 million jackpot. And since I’m broke, I was pretty pissed off it wasn’t me. Then I made myself feel better by remembering that most people who win the lottery have their lives ruined by the money. But that got me thinking, what exactly are you supposed to do, if you miraculously win, to keep it from ruining you life? (Surprisingly, “hookers and coke” is not the right answer.) After a little research, I’ve come up with a few quick tips for how to conduct yourself after becoming richer than your wildest dreams.

COED Staff | January 5, 2011 9:41 am

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Movies This Week: August 20, 2010

Expendables shot its way to #1 whlie Eat Pray Queef ate prayed and queefed its way into the second slot. Scott Pilgrim fai…

Neal - Johns Hopkins | August 20, 2010 2:45 pm

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Movies This Week: June 11th, 2010

Guitar riff. Black van with red stripe blasting through some bushes. Mohawk. Disguises. Guns. Bigger Guns. Tanks falling from the sky. Helicopters. Cigars clenched by the strongest set of mandibles ever. If you have a problem. If no one else can help. You can call on … THE A-TEAM. Man, has this been a long time coming.

Neal - Johns Hopkins | June 11, 2010 1:05 pm

lottery

What To Do If You Win the Lottery

Wednesday, a lucky Queens, New York resident won a staggering $133 million in the Mega Millions state lottery. And since I live in Queens, I was pretty pissed off it wasn’t me. Then I remembered that most people who win the lottery have their lives ruined by the money. But that got me thinking, what exactly are you supposed to do, if you miraculously win, to keep it from ruining you life? (Surprisingly, “hookers and coke” is not the right answer.)

Andrew - Hunter College | July 8, 2009 5:32 pm