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Martin Shkreli Is Currently Sitting In Prison & Says It’s “Not That Bad”

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(Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images)

Martin Shkreli, AKA the Pharma Bro AKA the world’s biggest douche, who is currently awaiting sentencing for a fraud case, was thrown in jail back in September after he posted to social media asking his followers to procure a lock of Hillary Clinton‘s hair. You know, Martin Shkreli things

Given his slight frame and general shit-eating grin, one would imagine that prison would be hell-on-Earth for a dude like Shkreli. Alas, the little-troll-that-could is still full of surprises, as apparently, he’s telling his friends that prison is not “that bad”.

Writing to his friend Lisa Whisnant, Shkreli describes prison as “not that bad”  and the “bright sides” it offers.

via New York Post:

The 34-year-old is spending his time mentoring fellow inmates, reading, playing chess — and learning to deal with sharing a small, cramped cell with a snoring roommate, pal Lisa Whisnant told The Post.

“Things are not THAT awful here,” inmate 87850-053 wrote to Whisnant, underlining “THAT” three times. “There are some bright sides. I am teaching these prisoners some new things and hopefully some ways to change their lives.”

Following the mixed verdict in August, Shkreli joked on his livestream that he’d be kicking back at “Club Fed” — playing basketball and Xbox.

According to Ms. Whisnant, Skreli is handling jail with “typical Shkreli style.”

He brings people together and shares his knowledge. Martin was meant to be a teacher. He loves it. He’s a natural.” Shkreli did admit, though, it’s not all fun and games.

“He says he has a small uncomfortable bed, and his sleep quality is very low,” shared Whisnant, who says she’s known the infamous internet troll for two years.

Shkreli’s also been subjected to “sorrowful stories,” he writes, such as a purported mobster crying in his room.

“There’s a lot of pain on these [prisoners] that people don’t see,” Whisnant said, regarding the alleged wiseguy’s whimpers. “He’ll be absolutely fine. He always is.”

Shkreli was tossed behind bars when Brooklyn federal Judge Kiyo Matsumoto took Facebook postings about Hillary Clinton as a solicitation for assault. Shkreli, in typical Shkreli fashion, tried to defend his actions under the guise of satire. Needless to say, Matsumoto was having none of it, as she revoked his $5 million bond and ordered him held until his January 16 sentencing.

Convicted on two counts of securities fraud and one count of conspiracy to commit securities fraud in August, Shrekli faces up to 20 years in prison.

All in all, it’s just another bonkers quote from the world’s most punchable face, which continues to lead me to believe that Shkreli’s one true goal in life is to be immortalized as the biggest troll who has ever lived.

How else do you explain this man?

COED Writer
A New Jersey native & Rutgers University graduate who firmly believes it's better to be lucky than good. My goal in life is to one day write a Batman screenplay. You can probably find me somewhere cooking either too little or too much pasta. contact me - eric.italiano@teamcoed.com