If you told me a guy got caught having sex in his car and drunk driving, I’d come close to betting my life that the sex came before the driving. Well, in this case, I would die, because Alan Luces Krueger decided he needed to get a nut in AFTER he wrecked his car while driving drunk. Talk about giving zero f*cks.
Krueger is being charged with both a DWI and the assault of a police officer in connection with the incident, which took place in White Bear Township, Minnesota early Monday.
A criminal complaint details how a nurse driving home from her ER shift noticed a vehicle pointing the wrong way in a ditch off of Otter Lake Road with lights on and engine running. Concerned, the woman pulled her car over and went to check if anyone was inside the car. When she looked through the window she saw a man and woman engaged in sex. Neither person reacted when she knocked on the window, and worried that the woman was drunk and vulnerable, the witness called 911.
Ramsey County Deputies arrived and found Kruger in the driver’s seat of his car. The woman was drunk and covered in vomit. She was too intoxicated to answer questions, so deputies called her brother to get her home safely.
What a sight. If I were a cop, these are the kind of calls I would look forward to, so long as no one was hurt. Being a cop is probably some heavy shit, so rolling up on a couple drunken idiots covered in puke and stanking like sex has got to lighten thing up a little bit, right?