Have you ever wanted to drink beer filled with a hot model’s vaginal bacteria? Well, if you’re a severely disturbed person with a disgraceful palate, we have good news: this is now a thing you can do.
Czech model Alexandra Brendlova has graciously donated her vaginal bacteria (specifically Lactic acid bacteria) to Bottled Instinct, a new beer created by the vayjay loving start-up The Order of Yoni. They promised to capture the essence of femininity and they sure as hell delivered.
According to Metro, the process is just as upsetting as you thought:
Its makers create it by taking bacteria from the vagina using a ‘gynecological stick’. This stick then goes to a laboratory, where the lactic acid bacteria are ‘isolated and cleaned’ then multiplied.
That bacteria is then used in a culture starter kit, and is combined with water, malt, hops, wooden chips, and yeast to create the beer.
The Order of Yoni says the beer has ‘no vaginal smell or taste’, but it has been ‘flavored with instincts’ and brewed with model Alexandra’s ‘lure’ and ‘grace’.
WHY!? JUST WHY?!
The brand’s Indiegogo page explains that using a woman’s vaginal bacteria is like having a woman in beer form… whatever the f*ck that means. The ad explains it a bit better:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=mmpO2ToLswc
Creepy. But not as creepy as The Order of Yoni’s incredibly upsetting “persuasion tactic”: if you give more than $11,000, the company will give your 60 bottles of beer made with your girlfriend’s vaginal bacteria.
Great! Chivalry is not dead, people, and romance is alive! Drink up! Then throw up (quickly)!
