It looks like everyone in America is going to get some snow real soon–unless you’re in Hawaii, and parts of the Southwest, and Southern Florida, and (weirdly enough) Alaska. Those states might not be getting snow–but the people there have our sympathies. They’ll be living in the parts of the country where people aren’t erecting giant snow penises.
America loves to erect giant snow penises–and especially where the snow is landing on a college campus. We know that this evil polar vortex that’s about to rain down an early winter might not smite all the states equally. Some college campuses will be struggling to create their giant snow penises, while other campuses will be able to create entire armies of frozen fortitude. Life is unfair like that.
These giant snow penises must also be preserved for posterity. After all, the only thing more fun than making a giant snow penis is posing with the finished artwork. Just take a look at all of these proud men and women showing off their mighty works. It’s downright inspiring, and we’re sorry that Hawaii can’t join in the fun. We’d like to see some Hawaiian ladies doing that…