Welcome to the tastiest time of the year. You’ve just stumbled upon National Junk Food Day, folks! Better call The President asap! Donald “Tickle Me” Trump admittedly loves fast food. He allegedly gorges himself on Big Macs and buckets of KFC Chicken. Worst of all, he only shares his food on Twitter. Throw me a wing, Donnie Boy!
Hold up…is this cat eating fried chicken with a fork and knife? I’ve only seen this once before in my life. My grandparents brought home some fried chicken for dinner. Pop Pop thought he’d teach my brother and I how to eat like “civilized human beings” by using silverware to eat finger-food. Neither the fork nor the butter knife could penetrate the hard breading. Eventually, they gave up with the obedience school routine and we got to eat some chicken.
Junk food can be a guilty pleasure for some. A daily routine for others. And damn am I getting hungry.
KFC sounds cool and all, but last time I went there, the cashier told me he didn’t have hot wings, honey BBQ wings or extra crispy fried chicken. Plus, they were going to charge me over $15 for two Zinger chicken sandwiches and one three-piece crispy tenders meal. At that point, I said f*ck it, went back to my hometown and got a hold of some Popeyes. I bought 13 pieces of the mild mixed chicken for about the same price as they were going to charge me at KFC for just two sandwiches, a drink, potato wedges and three strips of chicken. Dammit, I’m probably going to be craving fried chicken all day.
Pop Pop thought I’d die at a very young age because of how much I loved fried, junk food when I was younger. Whenever I got my hands on something fried or greasy, he’d always point out the devastating consequences of my food choices. But I just love foods that make me feel happy when I eat them.
My longtime favorite is BBQ spare ribs from small-scale Chinese restaurants, especially when I’m chilling in Queens, no matter if it’s Flushing, Jamaica, Glen Oaks or whatever. New York City is known for their superb Chinese food. Spare ribs are mainly an American dish. But many of these restaurants have blended this western cultural dish into a crack concoction that you absolutely have to try many times before you die. However, this pork product has probably knocked up some points on my cholesterol levels. So, remember to rib responsibly.
What’s your favorite type of junk?