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Original Version Of ‘Anchorman’ Was Wild As F**k, And Included Orangutans and Chinese Throwing Stars

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For many, Anchorman is considered to be one of the best comedy films of all time. But hey, did you know that this classic was originally going to be a whole lot different? How different, you may ask. Ron and the gang are trapped on a mountainside while being hunted down by orangutans armed with Chinese throwing stars. And that’s not all.

Sound like an idea crazy enough to work? Well, apparently it wasn’t good enough for Dreamworks or Paramount Pictures. No wonder Hollywood is in the shape that is it in, today.

Will Ferrell revealed the wild plot for the original version of Anchorman on The Bill Simmons Podcast that aired this past Friday:

““The first version of Anchorman is basically the movie Alive, where the year is 1976, and we are flying to Philadelphia, and all the newsmen from around the country are flying in to have some big convention. Ron convinces the pilot that he knows how to fly the charter jet, and he immediately crash-lands it in the mountains. And it’s just the story of them surviving and trying to get off the mountainside. They clipped a cargo plane, and the cargo plane crashed as well, close to them, and it was carrying only boxes of orangutans and Chinese throwing stars. So throughout the movie we’re being stalked by orangutans who are killing, one by one, the team off with throwing stars. And Veronica Corningstone keeps saying things like, ‘Guys, I know if we just head down we’ll hit civilization.’ And we keep telling her, ‘Wrong.’ She doesn’t know what we’re talking about.””

After reading these key details regarding Anchorman, I’m thinking that it’s only a matter of time before this scrapped plot turns into its own movie. The news gang can always get trapped on a mountainside with killer apes during the third film.

Anchorman is even Will Ferrell’s favorite movie. Well, maybe not his official favorite film of all time, but definitely his personal pick for favored film that he’s appeared on. “The one that stands out as the favorite, and it’s a hard choice, is Anchorman,” Ferrell said. “Because of the journey that it took. And it’s kind of the Cinderella story of the movie no one wanted to make.”

That film starring the mustachio newsman was even turned down 10 times in one. That’s not very classy news, Ron.

Anyway, we need more people from the media on mountainsides with orangutans and Chinese throwing stars. And we need that magic, whether it’s in the next Anchorman film or not.

And have no fear, Channel Four’s Brick Tamland will protect us all!

The Bill Simmons Podcast: Anchorman Original Plot

Here’s a SoundCloud recording of Will Ferrell’s interview on The Bill Simmons Podcast:

COED Writer
I've been sent out of college, with honors and such, on the search for the American Dream. I'm a New York native, filtering through the net for the next hit story. I'm a good bro, too. Check out my brother's art page: https://www.instagram.com/foulfacekoala/?hl=en