Suddenly this photo means so much more.
Everyone’s favorite GOP presidential hopeful is making his mark on the literary world – though not by his choice – with a new book that recently hit Amazon. Titled Trump Temptation: The Billionaire & The Bellboy, the bargain book is bound to become a masterpiece of the erotic lit world.
Think the gay version of 50 Shades of Grey but with bigots and flailing toupees.
For those of you sad souls who have yet to catch an excerpt, here’s what you’re missing:
“My loins trembled as the scent of toupee adhesive and spray tan swept through my nasal cavity”
“His gorgeous a** flapped behind him like a mouthwatering stack of pancakes in his pants. My hunger for pancakes had never been stronger.”
“I had to admit it, I wanted his geriatric 2006 Perez Hilton jello body, and I wanted it bad.
“The door creaked open and there he was, handsome as ever, like a giant melting fat carrot with fake hair.”
Wow. You can feel the passion. And so can the Amazon reviewers.
Can you think of a better way to spend that $1.99? No. And with that God damn Winter Storm Jonas heading right for the East Coast, you may not have anything better to do anyway.