Can We Talk About How ‘Muhammad-Al-Lean’ Is The Greatest Criminal Name Ever?

When you’re a criminal, you want a name that sticks. You want a name that people can remember you by, but one that also describes the types of crimes that you’re committing. Of course, I’m not a criminal but I imagine that’s the way criminals think. The streets are always talking, so I figure that you’d want a catchy nickname that people can mention on the block and that will make you seem simultaneously cool and knowledgeable of current events.

That’s where my dude “Muhammad-al-Lean” comes in. This guy has the nickname hustle down pat. Of course, he should probably also get the whole “not getting caught” thing down pat, but nobody’s batting 1.000. Can you guess what Muhammad-al-Lean was caught with? If you guessed something to do with lean or cough syrup, you’re right.

Muhammad-al-Lean (real name Harry Garcia aka “Cuban Harry”) was just charged with stealing dozens of bottles of cough syrup from over 50 different pharmacies around Southern Florida. He’s been linked to rappers like Chris Brown, Lil Wayne, and more.

Here’s how it happened: Muhammad began selling cough syrup on places like Instagram and Facebook, made a name for himself in the music industry, but then got popped for distribution sometime in October. Police believe that while Harry was in jail, he ordered a number of thieves to rob a series of pharmacies across South Florida. So now in addition to distribution charges, Harry is now facing charges of racketeering, grand theft, and trafficking in illegal drugs.

Real talk: I’ve always kind of wanted to “lean” but by the time I had the cojones to order it on Instagram, Actavis had already stopped producing bottles and I didn’t want to get caught buying the fake stuff. So MaL, if you’re out there and reading this, remember who was the one giving you props on your name.

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