New Movie Trailers: ‘Assassin’s Creed,’ ‘Yoga Hosers,’ And More… [VIDEOS]

assasin's creed trailer video

We’re thinking that Captain America: Civil War is going to oversee George Clooney bombing again with Money Monster, but George still probably had a great time at the Cannes Film Festival this week. Meanwhile, we were once again skipping the champagne and enjoying some more cinematic sneak peeks — and it’s a fun mix of blockbusters and weirdness. We’re just a little confused at this new trend of having little introductions for trailers nowadays. We should’ve gone to Cannes and asked somebody about that….

Assassin’s Creed

This was the big deal trailer of the week, with Jimmy Kimmel Live! hosting our first look at the big-screen Callum Lynch — played by Michael Fassbender as he explores the memories of his ancestor Aguilar and gains the skills of a Master Assassin. Then he decides to turn into a video game instead of a superhero, but that pays off because video game movies still get to play the multiplexes. Although Hitman: Agent 47 was kind of a bomb last summer. This could work out better…


Don’t Breathe

This is our favorite horror movie trailer of the week — mostly because we wouldn’t expect much tension from a film where three young people break into an old blind guy’s house and then get terrorized by the surprisingly resourceful victim. We’d like the movie even more if the old blind guy was just an old military veteran kicking the collective ass of a few meth addicts. It’s not quite that simple here, but we’re damn intrigued….


The Accountant

Here’s another teaser trailer which is actually a regular trailer, but it’s called a “teaser” because it doesn’t give away the ending. Anyway, it’s yet another hitman movie, but this time with Ben Affleck as your typical accountant who does assassinations on the side. We’re not sure why. Accountants can make a lot of money. We know that killing is fun, but people really need to spend more time away from the workplace…


Yoga Hosers

And here’s a fun little project from Kevin Smith, as he takes two characters from the surprisingly fun Tusk and give them their own movie. It helps that the Two Colleens are played by Johnny Depp‘s daughter and Kevin Smith’s daughter. Also, Johnny Depp returns in his unrecognizable role as the weird detective from Tusk. We knew this would be a weird movie, but we weren’t expecting a tribute to vintage direct-to-video schlock. Smith seems to mostly be paying tribute to the Full Moon studio. If you don’t know what a Full Moon movie was like back in the ’80s and ’90s (and even now), then you will when this trailer is over…..


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