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Naked Train Rider Calling Herself “The Goddess of the Train” Stops Chicago Train In Its Tracks


The daily commute can be a mind-numbing affair, especially if you live in an overcrowded populace like the Windy City. It can be even more of a bore if you have to rely on public transportation to take you to your place of work and back home again. You’re only likely to see more unhappy faces in the crowd at the Grown Ups 3 premiere.

But the people on Chicago’s famous Red Line train (well, probably just the males, along with some curious or confused women) got quite a nice pick-me-up on Saturday: a totally nude woman riding the train, according to Gawker.

The unidentified woman reportedly jumped the turnstile, disrobed and announced to her fellow passengers that she anointed herself the “Goddess of the Train” –instantly coining the most awkward stripper name since Sue Age decided to take a twirl on the pole.

Then, after slapping a couple of passengers (presumably because they were staring too long and making her feel uncomfortable), the Goddess ordered all of the passengers to get off. When they realized that she was referring to exiting the train, they filed out of the car and called police.

The woman intended to take over the train and drive it, but police arrived on the scene and escorted the woman into custody. She’s currently being evaluated at a nearby hospital. A police spokesperson said the woman suffers from an unspecified mental illness. The good news is that she’ll be able to cover her hospital bills with all the $1’s she got from the guys on the train.

[Image via Gawker, CTA Tattler]

COED Writer
I'm human. I swear.