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Don’t Worry, America: The Army is Prepared to Deal with Zombies


The sequester cuts that went through last March made a lot of stomach acid churn across the nation. They took a chainsaw to the federal budget including the notoriously high military budget and many worried that the cuts would make us vulnerable to our enemies. Well, you can sleep tight because we’re still as safe as a turkey at a PETA pot luck.

The US Army has taken a series of steps to prepare for the coming zombie apocalypse as part of its annual US Army-North’s Hurricane Rehearsal of Concept drills. That’s not a figure of speech. They’ve actually included the possibility of zombies in their drills and preparations.

They kicked off “Project Z” by inviting author Max Brooks, the writer behind the awesome Zombie Survival Guide¬†and World War Z¬†novels, the latter of which is being turned into a major motion picture starring Brad Pitt. They also held a mock triage drill in a landfill to assess the severity of a natural disaster much in the same way the military does in Brooks’ oral zombie history novel.

Of course, the inclusion of zombies in their drills are purely allegorical and just a way to help prepare mankind for actual, real world disasters by tapping into their inner-zombie geek.

But can you be absolutely sure that the zombies won’t come for us one day to destroy the whole of humanity? The kitana that I sleep with under my pillow every night would beg to differ.

COED Writer
I'm human. I swear.