What Do Guys Really Mean When They Say Things? [He Said/She Said]

Guys are simple. Not in the stupid, slightly slow way, but in the “easy to understand” way. Unlike with women, there are only a few occasions where a man does not come across as completely forward. So just to make sure that men and women are on the same page close to 100% of the time, I’ve come up with a list of the rare instances where we won’t be telling the truth.

“It was just me and the guys.” OK, we both know it wasn’t just a sausagefest at the party we were at but the reason I’m not telling you who was there is because I don’t trust you not to wig out on me.

“I’m getting ready for bed and brushing my teeth. Can I call you back in a few?” I’m rubbing one out. Can I call you back in a few?

“I’m sorry.” … that you’re such a raging b*tch. Chill the f*ck out.

“You look so pretty.” I have a boner.

“Can I get your number?” There’s a slight chance I might call you later on next week. Having sex with me tonight either increases or decreases your chances. I just haven’t figured out which one it is.

“I’m just grabbing one drink.” I am going to go drink. I have no idea how long I’ll be there for.

“It’s fine.” Seriously, it is. Just drop it already.

CLICK HERE TO SEE WHAT SHE SAYS

Joe DeRosa’s Never Believe… In Chivalry
Joe DeRosa’s Never Believe… In Chivalry
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