There’s so much soccer on TV these days. I don’t know if ESPN made a deal with the devil or FIFA or what, but every time I turn on that channel, it’s just like soccer, soccer, soccer. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still better than SportsCenter, but… you know… what isn’t?
And I’m not one of those guys who’s going to say soccer is always boring. Because it isn’t. I love soccer. I also love watching no-hitters in baseball. I also love watching baseball. Maybe I’m just boring.
But here’s the deal. Not every soccer game is exciting. After a month, 90% of the teams in the Premier League have no chance of winning the championship. Meaning if you’re like me and have lost the login for your English Premier League fantasy soccer team, there’s no reason to watch.
Now I hear some of you diehard Premier League fans saying, “Well, you have to root for your team to avoid relegation!”
Well, you know what’s more exciting that relegation? Bombs. See proof above.
And I know we’re American, and supposed to be all anti-Iran and whatnot, but when a country gets something right, they get something right. So for once, let’s take a cue from our Iranian non-neighbors, get some bombs in late season soccer, and put that on ESPN.
It’s more exciting than a million SportsCenters!