How to Avoid Being a Douchebag Tourist in NYC [PHOTOS]

Millions of people visit New York City every year. Unfortunately, naive visitors throw a wrench into the delicate gears of this busy city with their clueless meanderings and obtrusive groups. Because of this, tourists are the most despised group of people in a city that likes to hate judge people. Here are a few unwritten laws of the land that you must follow to avoid coming across as a total douche, and pissing everyone around you off in the process.

General Guidelines and Must-Know Lingo: These are some guidelines, terms and phrases you should know before arriving.

  • If you don’t know where to go, ask directions. We will happily help you. But only ask once. If you forget, you’re on your own.
  • Keep your wallet in your front pocket, and don’t walk around with your money out.
  • PAY ATTENTION to everything you’re doing. We have to, and so do you.
  • Don’t talk to people in elevators.
  • The City: Manhattan (as opposed to the other four boroughs of New York City)
  • Uptown: North, Upper East Side, Upper West Side and Harlem.
  • Downtown: South; also refers to anywhere south of 14th street, most often used when referencing the Lower East Side, SoHo (south of Houston), NoHo (north of houston) and the Village.
  • Houston: Pronounced “house-ton,” not like the city in Texas.
  • The Train: the subway
  • F**king move!: “Excuse me, please get out of my way quickly.”
  • Let me get: “May I have…” Used when ordering anything. Not considered rude.
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