What’s up, COED Nation!? My name is Mike Simone and I’ve been working with COED contributor Charlie Romano for the Men’s Fitness Transformassacre to get him ripped in 8 weeks. Charlie and I worked on breaking things down within this series so that you can also get in Jersey Shore shape by Spring Break season so that you can take on Mexican cartels, scoop up hot college chicks, and kick some doosher ass if you need to. If you’re headed to one of the Trashiest Spring Break destinations we outlined, you’ll likely want to be able to do all three. Here are 4 rules for the 4 weeks prior to Spring Break.
1. PUT DOWN THE BOTTLE
I know – it sounds like blasphemy, but it’s very temporary. Some may claim the strategy of building up alcohol tolerance and preparing the liver for a 7 day, 7 night blurred memory bender but if you want to look your best, try kicking the bottle for 30 days. Why?
Alcohol takes a toll on your metabolism, that means less fat burning and more of a beer belly. All the added calories and late night munchies will screw you. Suck it up! There’s 12 months in a year, 1 month of abstaining from booze to focus on your training and physique will pay off when you’re sluggin’ a 6-er or sippin’ vodka rocks in the hot tub next to the smoke-show chicks looking leaned next to your less dedicated booze hound counterpart male companions.
2. SCREW TRADITIONAL CARDIO
Some cats think that hitting the treadmill, elliptical, or going for long runs is what will get them all tuned up for looking jacked come party time, but there’s an easier way. It’s called High Intensity Interval Training (HIIT for short). You can exchange the 45-60 minutes of boring runs for 20 minutes of “up and down” intervals. Start by jogging for 90 seconds, then sprinting for 30 seconds, and repeating that process until 20 minutes are complete. This shorter term strategy is intense and much more effective in burning off the beer belly fat.
3. KICK PROCRASTINATION AND CREATE ROUTINES
If you’re that dude who does his paper last-minute at 2 AM the day before it’s due, you should know that this attitude won’t cut it this time of year. Once again, there’s 12 months in a year for 1 month, build a routine around 2 things – training and diet. Here are the tips you could use.
- Pick 3-4 days to work out and stick to it. Monday can be Chest and Triceps, Tuesday can be Back and Biceps, Thursday Legs and Shoulders, Friday Abs and High Intensity Interval Cardio.
- Sundays are your cooking days. Prepare grilled chicken, turkey burgers or lean beef burgers for the entire week. Oatmeal, sweet potatoes, and steam-able frozen veggies can be your carb and fiber sources. Plan out 4-6 meals per day. It’s easy and will pay off. That means no late night pizza deliveries or General Tso’s Chicken.
4. GO INTO HIBERNATION
You don’t need to be a party animal 24/7. Go into hiding for a little while to focus on your training and diet. You can throw a party night in there once or twice over the month, but going into hibernation will have you focused on looking you best shirtless and in boardies (I hate that word, I prefer trunks.) Then, the minute you get off the plane, bus, train or whatever means of transportation and immediately head to the nearest bar, lounge, or tiki bar. Hell, why not crack open a road soda?
These guidelines might not be the sexiest or the funnest, but they’ll get you real results, real fast.