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Helena Christensen Is the Definition of Win For Triumph Essence Lingerie [PHOTOS]


How in the holy f*ck is Helena Christensen 43 f*cking years old?! Like outside of Demi Moore (who apparently keeps her figure by starving herself and doing whip-its), can you name another woman in her 40s who looks THIS good? I’ve been in love with her the Danish supermodel ever since I saw her in Chris Isaak’s “Wicked Games” music video. That was 1991! She’s been hotter longer than Miley “Penis Cake Licker” Cyrus has been alive! How weird am I? I want that to be the song that plays at my wedding. And if Helena’s not my bride, she still needs to be there in a g-string wedding dress.

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