We’ve covered a sh*t ton of polarizing subjects in “He Said / She Said”, but I think this one might take the cake. I’ve legit argued with a group of girls over the term “hook up” (and every variation thereof) for hours on end with no amicable or mutual compromise in sight – other than it occurs with someone you’re NOT in a relationship with.
We dudes tend to be more lenient with it, toss it around like a ‘bee. Chicks, though. Chicks take this sh*t seriously. We already know they fear being called sluts, whores, and what have you, so the expression “hooking up” is on par with sex.
Hooking up is that grey zone, no man’s land (ironic usage), in which you could have anyone willing to listen wondering what the hell happened. There’s no greater power in building one’s mystique or legendary baller-pimp status then by simply stating, “We hooked up.” The listener’s mind starts racing. What does that mean? An orgiastic scenario plays out as their imaginations take over. Well, while girls continue to deny what went down late night, we’re here to lay it all out on the line. Here’s how we define hooking up.
Urban Dictionary’s definitions:
“An incredibly ambiguous phrase that drives me absolutely insane when people use it.”
“Any form of getting some type of action, such as, making out, feeling things, or oral pleasure or sex between 2 people. “A hook up” is what’s referred to as doing those things when you’re not going out with anyone”
Some have said “to make out with someone” while others have said “to have sex with someone.”
Wikipedia’s entries are:
“Slang term for courtship, especially of short duration”
“Casual relationship or casual sex”
“Hooking up” is such a broad term, one that covers, in my mind, two of the four bases – second and third. If you’ve reached home, it’s no longer a hook up, it’s sex. If I were to go to my buddies and be like, “We hooked up”, they’d say, “that’s it?” In their minds, I didn’t achieve the ultimate goal: penile penetration.
Meanwhile, a girl asks her friend, “Did you and Ned hook up?” and, 9 times out of 10, respond with “No, we just kissed.” Yeah, you kissed the tip of his wang. See what she did there? She’s not lying, per se. Just bending the truth.
In many instances, guys will say they hooked up to make a weak attempt to get laid seem stronger. For example, a guy will hit on a girl all night, buy her drinks, feed her shots, go back to her place because he has zero influence over her, kiss like the plane’s crashing, get her belt undone (first sign it’s going nowhere, she’s wearing a belt), try to slip the hand under the panties only to get smacked away so you go for an over-the-panties rubdown. She gives you an OTPHJ and you end up spooning the rest of the night. Super lame. She’s telling her friends you guys kissed and you’re getting your buds worked up by saying you hooked up.
I’m fairly convinced girls will use “hooked up” in place of “sex”. The majority of girls will take the “we just kissed” line all the way up until actual full on intercourse. It’s a rare breed of woman who fully confesses all the details of hook-ups to her cohorts.
Guys will take anything to have an encounter be considered a hook up. She licked my ear! She pinched my nipple! She placed my hand on her hand as she touched herself. Ridiculous? Yes. But, “we hooked up” just sounds less emasculating than “I cupped one of her boobs.”
“Hooking up” is a guy’s term that women have attempted to hijack and make their own to sound less slutty or to mean something that it’s not. They use it the way gossip sites use it; to mean dating that will eventually lead to a relationship instead of standing doggystyle in an alley.
Simply put, “hooking up” is anything in between kissing with your mouth open to actual vaginal intercourse.