With Thanksgiving bearing down on us like an unmanned train full of volatile chemicals that only Denzel Washington and Chris Pine can stop, it’s time for us to reflect on those things for which we’re grateful. As you can probably tell from out Thanksgiving Poca-Hotness feature, Native American women top our list. Women like our very own Miss COED Sahar Khadjenoury. But, there’s a cornucopia of hot celebrities you didn’t know were Navajo…or Cherokee…or Sioux. Let us show you!
#25 – Shannon Elizabeth
Shannon’s a very hot vegetarian who made every guy’s memory bank with a mind blowing scene in American Pie then fell off the face of the earth only to strike it big in poker then waltz her way back into the national spotlight on Dancing With The Stars. Her mom’s Irish, English, German, and Cherokee.
#24 – Fergie
She’s hot, she’s not, hot, not, hot, not. Some say she’s a dude, others think she’s irresistible. The never-ending debate over Fergie will rage on until we meet our makers. Fergie’s maker added a dash of good ol’ Native American to the mix. We’re guessing that’s the part that lands her on hot lists.
#23 – Jennifer Tilly
Like fellow Native American Shannon Elizabeth, Jennifer’s a poker hottie whose same sex sex scene with Gina Gershon in Bound made our 10 Movies That Will Get You Laid list. You might’ve heard her seductive hiss when she voiced Bonnie, the forever pregnant wife of Joe on Family Guy. Her mom’s Irish and Native American…what is UP with that combo?!? Did we miss a Lord of the Rain Dance orgy or something?
#22 – Hunter Tylo
Born Deborah Jo Hunter in Fort Worth, Texas, Hunter is best known for her role on the soap opera The Bold and The Beautiful. She was cast in Melrose Place but was fired because she was pregnant and sued Aaron Spelling. Her mom’s of Cherokee descent. Man, those Cherokee women are super “friendly”, am I right all you Irish, Scottish, and German immigrants?
#21 – Kristen Chenoweth
This award-winning actress, singer, and best-selling author has appeared on Broadway in the play Wicked and on TV shows The West Wing, Pushing Daisies, and Glee. We highly suggest renting “Four Christmases” to see her play the sister of Reese Witherspoon’s character. She was born in Broken Arrow, Oklahoma as a result of Broken Rubber. Haha, we made up that last part about the malfunctioning contraceptive.
#20 – Malese Jow
Malese is a 19 year old actress-singer/songwriter best known for playing a fashionista on Nickelodeon’s Unfabulous and a teen vampire on CW’s The Vampire Diaries. You might’ve seen her as Alice Cantwell in The Social Network, yet she refuses to accept our friend request. WTF. Her mom’s of Cherokee descent. Before the 19th Century, polygamy was common amongst the Cherokee. Okay… this is like picking players for your basketball team… we’ll take Malese, Vanessa, Moore, Biel, and everyone else on this list.
#19 – Mickie James
We featured Mickie in our coverage of the WWE Divas Thanksgiving Turkey Shoot pictorial and in the Confessions of a Wrestling Fanatic. She’s a five time WWE Women’s Champion who’s now in the TNA Wrestling organization. She also released a country music album in May of this year. She’s part Powhatan, which a Virginian tribe. They say Virginia’s for lovers. Well, we’d love to slip ourselves a Mickie.
#18 – Traci Bingham
Traci’s best known for her stint on Baywatch, her pictorials in Playboy, VH1′s The Surreal Life and her nice melons. Her dad’s Cherokee and Italian. I wonder if fist pumping is allowed during rain dances.
Salli’s birthday is TODAY (11/23)! Happy birthday, Salli. She’s best known for her roles in A Low Down Dirty Shame, The Great White Hype, Antwone Fisher, the Anacondas sequel, and I Am Legend as the wife of Will Smith’s character. Her mom’s African-American and Cherokee. I feel like the Cherokees are the Caucasians of the Native American world only not as oppressive and privileged. Uh, moving along…
#16 – Angie Harmon
Angie’s best known for her stint on NBC’s Law & Order and being married to former New York Giants cornerback Jason Sehorn. You can find her on our list of the hottest Texans. Her dad’s Irish, Scottish, and Cherokee, which is probably a huge reason why Sehorn never signed with the Redskins. Ouch, Washington, D.C. Very ouch.
#15 – Ciara
Much like Fergie, Ciara’s been labeled with the unjustified “man” tag, Ciara has been the subject of sex change rumors ever since 2005. One thing sure not to change is her Native American heritage. She’s also, German, Creole, and Irish – her name’s even Irish for “dark” which is where her sexuality was for a while. That’s not right. We apologize. She’s a chick and she’s hot. You can ogle without concern, guys.
#14 – Ursula Mayes
Ursula was case #5 on Deal or No Deal for four seasons. She’s set to appear as one of Santa’s Helpers on two episodes of NBC’s Minute To Win It. She’s also appeared in Muscle & Fitness, Maxim, Stuff, Elle, Esquire, and FHM. She was the cover model for Juiced 2, appearing in their commercials as well. People named her one of the 100 most beautiful people. We featured her as one of the most bodacious babes of BETUS. You can also see her on Ask Men and Made Man’s Chickipedia. Her dad’s German and Native American and never experimented with sea creatures, which is why this Ursula is not some evil queen of the sea.
#13 – Cameron Diaz
She’s a sexy celebrity stoner, a pro weed chick who is eco-friendly and looks super in a Supergirl costume. In her Playboy interview, she stated she’d get on a plane in a heartbeat for a hard-on, which would explain her hook up with A-rod and her placement on our WAGs of the 2010 MLB LCS list. Her mom’s German and Native American and in 2005 there were reports she’d marry Justin Timberlake in a Native American dress. PowWOW!
#12 – Kari Wuhrer
Kari’s a 43 year old actress and singer whose TV credits include parts on Married With Children, Swamp Thing, Beverly Hills 90210, a couple CSIs and General Hospital. Her film credits include a sh*t ton of B-movies and horror/action movies like Anaconda, Eight Legged Freaks, and Beastmaster 2. Holy Taco featured her in their weekly MILF Mondays feature and you can find her on Chickipedia. She’s of German and Cherokee descent.
#11 – Mandy Moore
Like many other women on our list, she has a habit of dating Ass-getting Assclowns, but there’s not a shot in hell we hold that against her. We would like to hold something against her but we don’t want to make her blush (or laugh at us). Moore’s father is of Irish and Cherokee descent. The Cherokees historically settled in the southeast U.S. and are the largest of the tribes in the nation. The more you know! (*cue shooting star graphic*)
#10 – Carmen Electra
This future Golden Girl is sexy no matter where she is or what she’s wearing. Whether it’s in a mugshot, in a sweater, a towel, or bodypaint. She recently made an appearance at the ARIAs (Australian Recording Industry Awards) but is best known for showing her AREOLAs in Playboy. Her mom’s of German and Native American descent but she makes this list because she has her own line of stripper poles.
#9 – Demi Moore
We featured Demi in our list of the 99 Sexiest Ladies of the 80s and our feature on Hot-Ass Hollywood Cougar Tails. Somehow, after 5 years, she’s still married to Ashton Kutcher despite allegations he’s been cheating on her with some 21 year old chick. Demi’s the elder Moore of Cherokee descent on this list. We want more of Moore & Moore. That should be a sitcom… or at least a lesbian buddy cop softcore flick on Skinemax.
#8 – Vanessa Hudgens
We at COED haven’t seen a single minute of her work, so why do we love her? Maybe it was her nude pics or the fact she washes her face with a vibrator or she’s co-starring in the best “dude” film of 2011. Her dad’s Irish and Native American. Invention alert: peace pipe that doubles as a funnel.
#7 – Karen McDougal
Karen was Playboy’s Playmate of the Month for December 1997 and Playmate of the Year in 1998. She was voted the second sexiest Playmate of the 90s in 2001 and was the first woman to appear on the cover of Men’s Fitness magazine. She’s of… wait for it… Cherokee and Irish descent. Those two groups absolutely LOVE each other. Or maybe they just don’t like condoms?
#6 – Charisma Carpenter
She was on the TV series Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel, and she posed for Playboy. Like Megan Fox, she was also rumored to be the next Wonder Woman. She’s of Cherokee descent, so we’re hoping to take her “off road” for a “good ride.” We’re drowning in double entendres over here!
#5 – Beyonce
She makes songs that no guy will admit to owning and is an inspiration to single ladies everywhere. She’s also on our list of most bangable chicks in music despite being Jay-Z’s wifey. Her mom’s of Creole descent, part African, Native American, and French. Your mom’s got a bold scent… BUTTERSCOTCH!
#4 – Megan Fox
Megan recently married her on-and-off bf Brian Austin Green and handed off her role as lead hot girl in the Transformers franchise to Rosie Huntington. She’s one our 50 Most Popular Women On the Web and has been photographed by the absolute man Terry Richardson. We were pumped when rumor spread she might be the next Wonder Woman and we questioned those who called her a freakshow for her thumbs. We give her double thumbs up for being a dreamweaver.
#3 – Jessica Alba
This Girl of Machete and eco-friendly actress has perfected the ass-out pose prompting numerous copycats. DNA tests on Lopez Tonight (really?) showed she’s 13% Native American while other sites report her grandmother was Quebecois, the Native Americans of the Great White North (Canada). One thing’s for sure, she really likes to jiggle. Wait ’til her kids watch her on Sesame Street.
#2 – Jessica Biel
She was one of our TV Characters You Wanted To Hook Up With as the good girl gone bad on 7th Heaven and she looks wicked hot in a wifebeater. She’s also one of the most dangerous women on the web. An interview with People revealed she’s Choctaw, a tribe originally from the Southeast. Most Choctaw supported the Colonies’ bid for independence from the British. We support Jessica’s independence from the tyranny of her clothes.
#1 – Carrie Underwood
Speaking of WAGs, since marrying hockey player Mike Fisher she’s become one of the 50 sexiest WAGs in the world. Not only is she one of the hottest girls in country music but one of the most bangable in the entire music industry as well. Of course, Mr. Fisher might bang your face with his fist if you try anything, but you have free will, do what you want. She’s of Muscogee or Creek descent. Her ancestors once had a land dispute with the Choctaw. We say let her and Biel settle this in the mud wrestling ring.