15 Signs You’re an Internet Weirdo


One of the greatest features of the internet is its ability to bring people together; unfortunately, a select group of those people were better left in solitude sans modems. These internet weirdos (iWeirdos, if you will) were the kind of people you avoided in high school and for good reason. Don’t know the signs? GASP – read on at your own risk!

1.  You play World of Warcraft more hours per week than you work at an actual job.

2.  You have a Hotmail email account that is used solely for stalking teenage girls on Myspace.

3.  CraigsList’s personal ads (“casual encounters”) are on a RSS feed on your homepage.

4.  Your desktop background changes with your mood, and you know the exact size to search in Google images.

5.  Despite the revolution, you still chat on IRC.

6.  You have the top number of posts on more than five one forums having to do with video games, hacking, child porn, or conspiracy theories.

7.  It’s been seven years since you left the house, having discovered Peapod and Amazon for all of your shopping needs.

8.  You bring a dry erase board out to maintain the illusion of a conversation based around a white box.

9.  You’ve rigged your computer to explode if the RIAA ever latches onto one of your torrents.

10.  You can’t go five minutes without checking your email.

11.  You’ve ever uttered the phrase “I can’t go out tonight; there’s a raid.”

12.  Every action — from turning your underwear inside out to tipping 5% at Panda Express — is simultaneously documented on your Facebook, Twitter, and Myspace.

13.  Whenever your mom/roommate/cat turns your computer off, your immediate response is murder.

14.  You know anything about port forwarding.

15.  You “read” COED Magazine.  :)

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