Last January we brought you the 10 Hottest NFL Cheerleader Squads. Almost three weeks into this season, we’re pulling the trigger and ranking the top 5 NFL cheerleader squads of 2010-2011. The lively ladies on this list spice up dull games and make us crave unlimited TV timeouts so the production van can cut to the sidelines for toothy smiles, bare midriffs, and bouncing breasts. Of the 31 teams with cheer squads (come on, Giants!), how does one distinguish the best from the rest? To find out, read on. Don’t forget to click on the images to access the photo galleries.
5. Denver Broncos
Denver’s cheer team makes COED Rocky Mountain high. This is the only team whose home games endure cold weather. Don’t give us that look [SPOILER ALERT] Dallas, 50 degrees is NOT cold. Despite the bitter frost and thin air, these Mile High hotties stay warm by gyrating more than Ochocinco after a game-winning TD. Their western-themed uniforms consist of leather chaps and jackets in the fall, skiwear for cold games (somebody say ‘snow bunnies’?), and a leather skirt and vest in the summer. According to their official site, the three uniforms “give the group flexibility” (haha).
4. Dallas Cowboys
I know. A real shocker, right? This “unknown” “darkhorse” of a team has done just about everything: calendars, TV shows, fantasy camps, the list goes on and on. Some say they put professional cheerleaders on the map. COED says… they’re overrated. You heard us. Don’t get us wrong, we’d still hit on them with the classic, “Killer boots, man!” line, but the loose, blouse-y sleeves have got to go. More skin = happier fans. They’ll forget the Boys have failed to advance past the second round of playoffs in 15 years. Your reign is coming to an end, cowgirls! Step it up or high step to the side.
When the Germans named the city to mean “Whale’s Vagina” their intention was clear: To STAY CLASSY. And, that’s what these Charger Girls bring to the football field. A level of class some other squads (*cough* Carolina Panthers *cough*) just don’t have. Consistently warm weather ensures these spirited sprites display as much skin as possible for as long as possible. Even without Melanie Brown, they have the goods to be considered among the great.
2. Miami Dolphins
Bienvenidos a Miami. Will Smith said he was going to Miami and I’m surprised he ever left. While the Dolphins football team has historically struggled, the team looks destined to make a run for the division title if not a decent playoff run. It’s understandable they haven’t appeared in the Super Bowl since ’84 – take a look at these chipper chicks. Plus, there’s like 80 of them. Truly a testament to the breadth of bright-eyed, blazing hot beauties in the Miami area. South Beach diet starts right f’n NOW!
Ah, Tampa. Miami’s sluttier, trashier, FUNNER little stepsister. The city’s the stripper capital of the nation and these could-be strippers keep their clothes on for the kids in the stands, but you can just picture them slithering down a pole. While you sip martinis with the Miami maidens above, COED will be shootin’ tequila with these tarts. God bless you, Tampa.