Despite your best efforts to ignore the chill as you stand on your porch choking down an ice cold one in your shorts and wife-beater, you can’t deny it: summer’s done. The Labor Day weekend parades compose the siren song of school bells, cold weather, and–saddest of all–miniskirts with leggings underneath instead of nothing. Harsh times. Fortunately, the temperature is the only thing that has to drop, as you can keep the summer spirit up with these mildly delusional suggestions.
1. Throw a themed party. Preferably beach-themed. Take advantage of included utilities, jack up the heat, demand a bathing suit dress code, and invite all of your hot-bodied friends. Decorate with beach balls and icy mixed drinks, all the while enjoying the hits of summer 2010 backed with an album of beach sounds.
2. Take a trip. It’s still warm somewhere and mid-terms aren’t for a few more weeks. Take a weekend off before things get too crazy and spend some time working on your post-summer tan. The babes will dig, and perhaps even a few will come with you if you mention the words “just like spring break” and “jell-o shots.”
3. Don’t put the top up. Summer’s never over if you’re cruising in style. Show off your manly intolerance to cold and rock the top down until the first snowfall. Blast cheesy beach tunes and wear your sunglasses nonstop to increase your summer fact by 10%. Ignore the things thrown at you–they’re just jealous.
4. Keep drinkin’ that summer ale. “It’s still summer in my hand, man!” you’ll shout at every party. Feels like summer the way people keep kicking sand in your face.
5. Don’t forsake the flip-flops. Nothing says summer like “thwack-thwack-thwack-thwack” everywhere you walk… when it’s caused by flip-flops, anyway. Otherwise, it’s just creepy.
6. Falsefiy the weather on your desktop. Set your Google weather zip code to somewhere perpetually hot. It’s always sunny near the equator!
7. Keep playing “Summer Games” on the Wii. Don’t switch to Mario & Sonic Winter Olympics just yet. For that matter, set Animal Crossing back to May. It’s summer in Nintendo land, bro.