magnifier menu chevron-left chevron-right chevron-down

Boobs, Beer, and Baubles


Two out of the three are favorites of men everywhere and the third can lead to more of one of the others during a certain time of year (I’ll let your minds wonder about which). In case you have not figured out when I’m talking about- it’s Mardi Gras!

You know what you need to do...

Yes, boob fans, Mardi Gras time is drawing near. Time to push your liver to the limits and haggle with drunk women (or sober even though it would be more challenging) to show us two of their best assets for some silly necklaces that will only end up in the back of their closets. What a wonderful tradition!


It goes without saying that the best place within the United States to go for this special time of year where sobriety is frowned upon is New Orléans; every man should go there at least once in his lifetime to experience the beauty that can only be found on top of a float in the French Quarter. What if you are unable to make it to New Orléans? Does that mean you’re screwed (and not in a good way)?

Fear not for there are other locales in this great country of ours where beads become currency and can buy you what you really want (I mean really want- hint, hint). The following are some alternate places where the economists in us all can study the value of beads.

Galveston, Texas

For both of us? Okay.

Every year over a quarter of a million people descend on this quaint little beach town and pack themselves into the Strand District for this annual event full of beer, babes, beads, and debauchery. With eleven parades and over 50 gala events there are plenty of chances to get your beads or you can brave the balconies along the Strand and practice your bartering skills. If you can’t make it to New Orléans, Galveston’s Mardi Gras is a pretty good substitute!

Mobile, Alabama

Nice beads.

Citizens in this fair town will argue with anyone that claims New Orléans was the first place in the United States to hold Mardi Gras festivities. According to them the glorious tradition started as early as 1703 in Mobile. Regardless, these guys know what they are doing and have had plenty of practice. Go to Mardi Gras in Mobile and what you do remember will only make you wish you didn’t have to wait another year to do it again (or do you…).

Biloxi, Mississippi


It does not try to claim it is any better or ahs more history than New Orléans or Mobile; they just love to party in their own right. The good people in Biloxi have been enjoying Mardi Gras celebrations for over 100 years. With a style described as New Orléans-ish, rest assured that you will not be settling by going to Biloxi!

There are many other cities that like to celebrate Mardi Gras. You would be hard pressed to find a city in Louisiana that does not; Lafayette is known for doing it right. San Diego has a pretty decent one as well as St. Louis. However, if you want to do it right- and can’t make it to New Orleans- then give Galveston, Mobile, and Biloxi a try! Your liver might hate you, but another part of you will be pretty darn happy.

  • COED Writer