Welp, it was only a matter of time before Meek Mill’s corny ass got dumped by Nicki Minaj. Now all we have to do is get Kylie to dump 150-pound-soaking-wet Tyga and the Earth’s natural equilibrium will finally be restored. Just as sure as the Earth’s rotation, Drake is going to pursue Nicki now that she’s single. The only question is this: How far will Drake go to close the deal this time? Will he write a song? Sing “Marvin’s Room” outside her bedroom window? Sacrifice a virgin goat to the gods? At this point, anything goes.
Early Thursday morning, Nicki took to Twitter to confirm that she and the walking meme that is Meek Mill, who have been dating since 2015, have broken up:
“To confirm, yes I am single. Focusing on my work & looking forward to sharing it with you guys really soon,” Nicki said. “Have a blessed New Year.”
The Drake-Nicki Minaj dynamic has always been interesting to me because Drake honestly seems like the more feminine of the two, which, according to me, is f*cking hilarious. Drake croons about love lost and times past, while Nicki spits 15 straight bars about stealing money and getting laid. I love knowing that even for a dude like Drake, who could literally have about 78% of chicks in the world, there’s always going to be that one chick who will always have the upper hand on you. Can’t say I blame the dude either. Nicki Minaj would hypnotize the manhood out of me too.
In all honesty, I’m pulling for Drake with this one. No matter who you are, or what your status may be, every man deserves to capture their great white buffalo. I’m just hoping he pulls it off without pulling a thirsty Drake move like spilling his heart out on national television. Luckily, he’s already done that, so it’s unlikely he forces the world to cringe through that for a second time. Unless of course, he’s thinking about going back to back again.