11-1. The Dallas Cowboys, with the rookie running back and the fourth-round rookie quarterback, are the best team in the NFL. Better than the Patriots, better than the Seahawks, the Broncos, the Raiders… Better than everyone. You know what else happened this year? Prince died. So did David Bowie. And Willy Wonka. And Professor Snape. Dave Chappelle came out of hiding. A walking meme became the president. Leo won an Oscar. An entire nation spent half a year mourning over a dead gorilla. Coincidence? I think not.
It’s been well documented that 2016 is one of the worst years in recent memory. But nothing makes me think that the world may actually be coming to an end more than the Dallas f*cking Cowboys being the best team in the league, led by two rookies. You know how rare it is for a rookie quarterback to be good, let alone potentially great, ESPECIALLY when he’s a fourth round pick? Very rare. Almost as rare as dozens of incredibly famous people dying and a guy with orange skin becoming the leader of the free wor-WAIT A MINUTE.
Yeah, we’re f*cked.