After three weeks of betting on the NBA, I am hotter than a fat guy at a baseball game. I went 4-1 again last Friday including hitting my first Lock of the Week of the year, and would have gone 5-0 if it wasn’t for the goddamn Knicks. I can’t help but put the blame on the shoulders of James Dolan on that one because he’s the most worthless human in sports. The good news for my Knicks is that it seems like they’re finally starting to realize that Kristaps Porzingis is the best player on the team, and are starting to get him the ball more, so that’s cool. Anyways, I love the games we have on tap for tonight and fully expect to have another week of winners. The picks are:
Cavaliers -9 @ Pistons
Hey, Lebron James, the word “posse” isn’t racist you fucking idiot. God, I hate that guy, but he’s been winning me a lot of money lately, so I’m going with the Cavs again tonight. The Cavs are just head and shoulders above the Eastern Conference, and most of the league for that matter, so I’m going to continue to bet on them until I’m proven otherwise. Weekly shoutout to J.R. Smith for being J.R. Smith.
Raptors -3.5 @ Nuggets
Is it un-American that I’m betting on a Canadian team the weekend before Thanksgiving? Extremely, but you know what is American? Making money by betting on Friday night NBA games in November, so we’re going with Toronto. They’re coming off of a hard-fought loss to the Warriors the other night, so I think they’ll rebound nicely and take out their frustration on the Nuggets. DeMar DeRozen has been playing great this year, and I don’t expect that to change tonight. And if you have any doubts about this pick, ask yourself this, who would you take in a fight, a Raptor or a Nugget? That’s what I thought.
Suns @ Pacers UNDER 218.5
This point total seemed kind of high to me, but I’m also an idiot so what do I know? Regardless, I’m taking the under here because other than Devin Booker and sometimes Eric Bledsoe, the Suns don’t really have anyone on their team that can score a ton. The same goes for the Pacers, as Paul George is the only one who can really create his own shot, so I think there will obviously be some scoring, I just don’t think it’ll hit the 219 mark. So bet the under, then go buy yourself something nice this weekend.
Thunder -9.5 vs Nets
I don’t give a shit that I’m 0-2 betting against the Nets this year, I’m making it my personal promise that I will never bet on them this year. The Thunder haven’t been great this year, but you wouldn’t be either if Kevin Durant left your team. Russell Westbrook is putting up stupid numbers, and if you think the Nets have anyone on their team that can stop him, well then here’s some news for you: there isn’t. I want to make this my Lock of the Week, but I’m 0-2 on Locks of the Week when I bet against the Nets, so before I get back to that, I need to ease my way back in and get a win betting against them first.
Clippers -7.5 @ Kings – Lock of the Week
The Clippers are damn good this year, or at least they have been through the first few weeks of the season. They’re recently coming off of their first loss, and I can’t imagine them dropping a second one in a row, especially to the Kings. Sacramento is a joke, and they’re going to continue to be a joke for the rest of the season. Take the Clippers and have a little bit of extra spending money at the bar for the Wednesday night before Thanksgiving when you’re getting blackout drunk with all your friends from high school.
With the exception of one under, I’m taking all favorites this week because I’m a goddamn genius/sucker, but I love all my picks this week. Let’s add another winning week to the record, and keep this thing going. Next Friday’s picks just happen to fall on my birthday, so hopefully the gambling gods treat me kindly with another winning week. See you then.
Record on the season: 10-5
Locks of the Week: 1-2