According to the late, great Aaliyah and 78-year-old Robert Scott, age ain’t nothing but a number. Last Saturday, the elderly man from Houston, Texas was outside a DoubleTree hotel in Kenner, Louisiana when an attractive young woman caught his eye. Scott approached the 29-year-old woman with some real smooth game, but surprisingly, she wasn’t having it.
“You look like a model, we should go out. I can treat you real well,” Scott told the woman, according to police. “No thank you, I have a boyfriend,” the woman replied.
When the woman–who, cops say, was attending “a class for aspiring models” at the hotel–did not jump at the retiree’s offer of a date, Scott instead suggested a “sugar daddy” arrangement. From there, Scott’s overtures took on a sexual tone, as first reported by The Times-Picayune.
The offended woman responded by telling the elderly pickup artist to “Please get out of my face.”
Scott did not handle the rejection well. Police allege that Scott unfastened his buckle and dropped his pants and underwear to the ground, introducing the victim to his not-so-super moon. “Okay, I’ll get out of your face,” said Scott, who allegedly exposed “his anus, buttocks, and part of his genitals” to the victim.
While it didn’t work out in the slightest, I gotta say I respect the hell out of Scott for mooning her. After she very clearly turned him down several times, Scott really only had two options. He could admit defeat and slink away to lick his wounds or he could pull down his pants and show her the goods. It was a Hail Mary for sure, but all Rico Suave dudes like Scott know that it’s always best to go down swinging. Desperate times call for exposed genitals.
Scott was arrested for obscenity and booked into Jefferson Parish Correctional Center on a $5,000 bond. But because fortune favors the bold, Scott was released on Tuesday without paying bond due to overcrowding at the jail. Things are looking up, Bobby!