Rough night for one of our boys at Penn State University. With their football team sucking this year, it’s unsurprising to see students channeling their drunken energy into different, more destructive activities.
Don’t wanna put the kid on blast, so we’ll only use his first name: Matt. Matt broke into a College Park residence around 2:30 A.M. According to The Daily Collegian, the responding officer reported the door had been smashed open and there were numerous pieces of glass and wood inside the living room of the residence. Matt had blood on his hands and a stain on his pants, “consistent with urinating oneself.” He also had bloodshot eyes, the odor of alcohol on his breath, and slurred speech. As the kids would say, our boy Matty was turnt.
Maybe the most Penn State part of the story is Matt claiming that the door was already broken. Classic troublemaker response. You can tell Matt has f*cked around a day or two in his life.
It’s kind of a bummer of a story, to be honest. I actually know multiple people who have broken into homes thinking it was theirs. In fact, it’s a relatively honest college kid mistake. Regardless, he faces some pretty serious charges.
Matt faces two felony charges for criminal trespassing and breaking and entering. He also faces a misdemeanor charge for tampering with property and a summary charge for purchasing alcohol as a minor.
That’s one insanely expensive, regrettable night.
[h/t The Daily Collegian]