We started yesterday by marveling at how CeeLo had decided it was a good idea to celebrate getting probation on rape charges by telling everyone on Twitter about how it’s totally cool to have sex with unconscious women. CeeLo was eager to explain that unconsciousness equals consent, or something like that. It was pretty hard to decipher everything.
And we also noted how CeeLo had panicked and Twittered a really lousy apology, but not soon enough (as we noted at the end of the day) to keep his reality-show from getting canceled by TBS. Well, that was a messy day. Fortunately, CeeLo decided to do some more damage control. A guy like CeeLo isn’t going to let some veteran publicist handle his affairs, either. He took it upon himself to write the amazing statement above, which might be the dumbest thing he’s done yet on Twitter.
We guess that it’s possible that CeeLo doesn’t know the meaning of “attribute.” Or is he really trying to convince us that, yeah, some stupid things were said on his Twitter account, but that just means that his Tweets can be “attributed” to him?
We do not know. We only know that CeeLo sounds as believable as we do when trying to explain credit card charges to our snooping girlfriends after we get back from a weekend in Vegas. “Baby, those charges are only attributed to that credit card,” we say. It doesn’t work then, either.