The Ten Commandments of Instagram

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10 Instagram Commandments-Lord Kelvin

We now live in an age when a lot of people have smart phones out there. Everyone from your 12 year old cousin to your Grandma is now on Facebook, Twitter and, of course, the awesome photography app Instagram.

As much as we love Instagram for all that it offers, there are a lot of ways for you to truly mess it up. So in the new tradition of COED’s 10 Commandments, we now offer you our wisest advice on how to navigate Instagram without seeming like a total tool…

Thou Shalt Not Put Up Quotes

1. Thou Shalt Not Put Up Quotes: Do we want to read your inspirational quotes? No. No, we do not. We want to look at pictures. This isn’t Twitter.

Thou Shalt Not Use Instagram As If It were Facebook or Snapchat

2. Thou Shalt Not Use Instagram As If It Were Facebook or Snapchat: If you must put up 30 pictures from an event, use Ye Olde Facebook–where creator Mark Zuckerberg welcomes you to put up as many pictures as you want. Or you could just continue to snapchat your friends all the pictures (although they might not be as enthused to receive them).

Thou Shalt Selectively Selfie

3. Thou Shalt Selectively Selfie: It’s okay to put up some selfies every now and then, but if your Instagram gallery is clogged with nothing but selfies–well, it’s time to re-evaluate your Social Media presence. And other things.

Thou Shalt Calm Down With The #Hashtags

4. Thou Shalt Calm Down With The #Hashtags: A few hashtags are fine, and often even necessary. Once you get past five hashtags, though, you’re probably pushing it. Now you just look kind of crazy.

 

Thou Shalt Not Be Overly Thirsty

5. Thou Shalt Not Be Overly Thirsty: It’s okay to follow as many Instagram models as you possibly can (we’re not judging you, believe us)–but when it comes to leaving comments, please show some discretion. Do you need some evidence of what gross stuff not to say? Just take a gander at Jen Selter’s comment section sometime.

Thou Shalt Not Instagram Under The Influence

6. Thou Shalt Not Instagram Under The Influence: At some point the night before, it seemed like a great idea to put up that “super, super trippy” photo from the Deadmau5 concert. Then came the next day when you looked at the blurry picture of a green light with three sympathy likes from your best friends, and you promptly deleted it. Just restrain your Instagramming to when you’re (mostly) sober. 

Thou Shalt Not Post a Shirtless Pic

7. Thou Shalt Not Post A Shirtless Pic: Bro, you go to the gym. Awesome. Good for you. But do you want to look like the biggest tool on earth to the females that you might be trying to impress? Then post as many shirtless pictures as you can manage. Mission accomplished.

Thou Shalt Not Post More Than 2 Pictures In A Row

8. Thou Shalt Not Post More Than 2 Pictures In A Row: Perhaps we’re being a bit harsh here, but each picture should be regarded as a gem. So even though you took ten pictures at the concert, just put up the best one. Not each picture needs a filter.

Thou Shalt Not Put Up Food Pictures

9. Thou Shalt Not Put Up Food Pictures: This isn’t 2010 anymore. Food pics on Instagram are not interesting to the world. Seriously, just save the food pictures for Snapchats to your friends. Trust us: 99 percent of the world doesn’t care about your Eggs Benedict at brunch.

Thou Shalt Follow @Coed

10. Thou Shalt Follow @COED: The reasons for that should be obvious by now.

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