Ricky Gervais made an appearance on last night’s Conan on the pretense of plugging his work in the new Muppets Most Wanted. But–as both fans and detractors know all too well– Gervais is the sort of guy who says whatever he damn well pleases; when Conan inquired about Ricky’s friendship with fellow funnyman Louis CK, Gervais lovingly described the Louie star as “a fat, bald, ginger slob,” adding that he’d become close enough to said slob “to have saw [sic] him naked.”
Things took a turn for the ribald from there, as Ricky described his experience as a guest on Louie—specifically, as the addled doctor performing Louie’s rectal exam. CK, apparently, went entirely nude for the scene, save for a cellophane genital wrap reminiscent of “some sort of weird… Japanese bondage.” Ricky’s retelling brought with it this litany of adjectives: “horrendous,” “horrible,” “awful,” “disgusting,” “hot and clammy”—you know, typical H.P. Lovecraft fare—before noting that the odor was that of “sweat and shame.” Give yourselves a minute, dear readers, and imagine your senses immersed in that world of flesh and stink.
Eventually, Conan corralled Gervais into addressing the matter at hand—Muppets. Ricky seemed genuine and even nostalgic as he spoke of his lifelong affinity for the A-list puppets. After that token dose of tenderness, however, the conversation once again went blue. The comic was so impressed with what the Muppets lent to his beloved story A Christmas Carol, he said, that he wondered aloud what other classics might be improved by Jim Henson’s Creature Shop. The first to spring to Gervais’ mind? Schindler’s List and 12 Years a Slave.
“Let’s try it, at least!” he begged of a shaken Conan. Put a video together for Kickstarter, Ricky, and we’ll see how things go from there.