Even if you’re not religious, Christmas can be a magical time of year.
Families and friends come together to distract each other from their sad lives. Gifts are exchanged, which exposes those who are dependent on other people’s charity to afford the things they couldn’t buy themselves. We’re looking at you, children.
But then there’s the Christmas outfit: the part of Christmas that makes it ugly, seedy, and more plausible that Santa works in an auto plant in Lordstown, Ohio rather than a mysterious spot at the North Pole. What’s worse, people have been trying to make ugly Christmas sweaters ironically hip. Now they’re not ugly, they’re unsettling. The person wearing it could be perfectly pleasant on the eyes, but once that holiday horror fabric goes on, it’s demon-hate and upset stomachs for any onlookers.
Here’s some especially upsetting Christmas get-ups to toughen you up before the big day. Some of the photos might not seem upsetting, but try to picture how much better-looking each person would be without the outfit on…but you know, not naked. Just with another outfit on, perv.