How To Let Her Know Exactly How Kinky You Are [HE SAID/SHE SAID]

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I’ve been seeing a lot people reading 50 Shades of Grey on the subway lately — so much that I actually remembered the title of the book when I saw it on the news today. Apparently everyone is up in arms about the new version of ‘Mommy Porn’ because the book’s protagonist is about a guy who loves S&M. So what, doesn’t everyone? If you’re not a fan of bondage on some level, I would hazard the guess that you’ve either never tried it or you’ve had a bad experience. I don’t feel like listening to your sob stories, so I’ve chosen to dedicate this week’s He Said/She Said to discuss how one might bring up the topic of being a little more rough in the bedroom. By the time I’m done with you, Chris Brown is going to be asking you for tips… on how to be a rough gentleman. [lead image credit: Cause Equals Time]

The first thing you need to figure out is how you’re going to bring up the subject. Confidence is key here; not because you need to establish dominance or anything, but because you don’t want her laughing when you tell her that you want nothing more than to spank her. (See? That’s funny even reading that). I suggest first bringing it up right after you two have had sex, when she’s chilling in your sweaty arms. Those moments always seem like everyone’s at their most vulnerable, so you might peak her interest. Additional options are telling her over dinner or leaving a paddle hanging up in your closet for her to see.

Image credit: dukibu / Shutterstock

If you’re feeling particularly lucky, you could always just try to sneak it in there. I’m not talking about butt-sex. I’m talking about a little spanking or hair pull. These are two examples of things can lead to heavier stuff, yet is playful enough that you can pass it off as getting in the mood. I don’t suggest surprising her in bed with a latex body-bag, that’s something you both should try working up to.

However you feel like bringing the subject up, I remind you to keep in mind that you’re both responsible adults having consensual sex. What you’re doing should be interesting, fun, and exciting — not at the expense of humiliation or tears. Having said that, slap the sh*t out of your woman’s butt (consensually) and feel free to give her the old catcher’s mitt while you’re at it. (Just imagine the way a catcher holds his glove before taking a 90 MPH fastball).

CLICK HERE TO SEE WHAT SHE SAID ABOUT IT

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