This is a hot, hot week in television. There are a lot of premieres, so this week’s column is just the tip of the iceberg! Dive in at your own risk.
Dancing With the Stars – ABC – Monday, Septemeber 20, 8 p.m. (ET)
Season premiere. Normally this show would be relegated down to the “What Your Girlfriend’s Watching” section. But with David Hasselhoff set to perform in full ballroom regalia, this is something that everyone will be wanting to see. Not even the manliest of men can resist the Hoff.
CBS Monday Sitcoms – CBS – Monday, September 20, 8 p.m. (ET)
This season the lineup is as follows: How I Met Your Mother, Rules of Engagement, Two and a Half Men, and Mike & Molly.
Lonestar – Fox – Monday, September 20, 8 p.m. (ET)
Series premiere. The protagonist of this drama is a con-man with two identities and two relationships. What an underachiever.
The Event – NBC – Monday, September 20, 9 p.m. (ET)
Series premiere. It seems to be some sort of actiony show, but the network has been tight-lipped on what exactly it is about. Will we find out in this premiere? Probably not. But it has something to do with kidnappings, conspiracies, and a president…so we’re in.
Chase – NBC – Monday, September 20, 10 p.m. (ET)
Series premiere. This action-adventure follows a U.S. Marshal as she hunts for criminals. Based on the commercials, we’d say there’s a lot of running and jumping involved.
Hawaii Five-O – CBS – Monday, September 20, 10 p.m. (ET)
Series premiere. It’s cops, beaches, and action galore. Since you’re never going to get that song out of your head anyway, you might as well get some entertainment out of the show.
Raising Hope – Fox – Tuesday, September 21, 9 p.m. (ET)
Series premiere. In this sitcom, a young man gets custody of his baby…and proceeds to mess the little thing up for life.
Running Wilde – Fox – Tuesday, September 21, 9:30 p.m. (ET)
Series premiere. In this sitcom, a rich guy (Will Arnett) woos a do-gooder (Keri Russell). Because there is nothing hotter than a humanitarian. Mother Teresa proved that 10 times over!
ABC Wednesday Sitcoms – ABC – Wednesday, September 22, 8 p.m. (ET)
The lineup consists of The Middle, Better With You, Modern Family, and Cougar Town.
The Undercovers – NBC – Wednesday, September 22, 8 p.m. (ET)
Series premiere. This new J.J. Abrams show is packed full of spy action. The twist? The spies are married.
The Defenders – ABC – Wednesday, September 22, 10 p.m. (ET)
Series premiere. This show is about two charismatic attorneys in Las Vegas. What sorts of business could attorneys possibly have in Las Vegas?
The Office – NBC – Thursday, September 23, 9 p.m. (ET)
Seventh season premiere.
Outsourced – NBC – Thursday, September 23, 9:30 p.m. (ET)
Series premiere. A young American goes to India to work at a call center. Cross-cultural hijinks ensue.
The Simpsons – Fox – Sunday, September 26, 8 p.m. (ET)
The 22nd season premieres the right way…with guest stars from Glee and Flight of the Conchords.
Family Guy – Fox – Sunday, September 26, 9 p.m. (ET)
Season 10 premiere. It’s a murder mystery tonight on Family Guy.
Amazing Race – CBS – Sunday, September 26, 8:30 p.m. (ET)
Seventeenth season premiere. The teams are off to London, and one lucky team will get a big advantage for future legs of the race…private jet? Help from Phil? Jetpacks?
What Your Girlfriend’s Watching
Glee – Fox – Tuesday, September 21, 8 p.m. (ET)
Second season premiere. The show is back with more songs, more singers, and more sass than ever.
Grey’s Anatomy – ABC – Thursday, September 23, 9 p.m. (ET)
Seventh season premiere! The shooting rampage is all over, but the recovery is not. How will the doctors cope? By seeing doctors, silly!