The Top 10 “Poster Dunks” of All Time

Maxim Announces Their 2010 Hot 100Maxim Announces Their 2010 Hot 100
Introducing The Insanely Hot Ironette Dancers [13 Galleries]Introducing The Insanely Hot Ironette Dancers [13 Galleries]

There is nothing better in the game of basketball than a good ol’ fashioned “Poster Dunk”. For those who don’t know, the poster dunk is when the dunker throws down a slam on an opposing defender who attempted to block the lane to pick up a charge call..here is a good example of Kobe Bryant back in high school. Great poster dunks result in the defender having to deal with the embarrassment of getting slammed on.  There is nothing more demoralizing than a poster dunk. You can blow someone up in football and fool batter’s with a curveball, but the poster dunk is on a pedestal of its own.

10. LeBron James reminds Damon Jones that he is small.

I remember watching this dunk and thinking what in God’s name was Damon Jones thinking on that play? All you need to do is compare the sizes of the two. LeBron James is 6’8″ and 250 pounds of solid muscle who thrives off of drives and dunks and Damon Jones is 6’3″ and 195 pounds soaking wet. Who’s going to win? Just take a look.

Who wants to bet that Jones is still having nightmares of a 6’8″ monster rising up and slamming a dunk on his back.

divider-grey2

9. Vince Carter does not care for Defensive Player of the Years and that means you Alonzo Mourning.

Three facts I would like to point out first. Fact number one: Alonzo Mourning is one of the top shot blockers in league history. Fact number two: Vince Carter is one of the top dunkers in league history. Fact number three: Vince Carter doesn’t care if Alonzo Mourning is one of the top shot blockers in league history.

My belief is that nobody should even try to contest a Vince Carter dunk because it always ends up in the same exact way for any defender. We’ll see that later on, trust me.

divider-grey2

8. Tracy McGrady adds another poster to Shawn Bradley’s resume.

It’s not saying a lot to dunk on Shawn Bradley. The guy is 7’6″ ,which is the third tallest in NBA history, and yet the guy get’s dunked on more than any other NBA player by far. He was weak, he was scared, and he was a mormon. Not a great combination when you’re trying to contest the dunk of a prime Tracy McGrady.

The commentating is phenomenal. Kevin Harlan with the call and Doug Collins calling McGrady sleepy eyed. Easily the best commentating on this list and it only adds to the essence of this monster of a poster.

divider-grey2

7. Dwyane Wade dunks on Anderson Varejao’s soul.

When the Miami Heat and Cleveland Cavaliers play each other, it’s always an affair to look out for. Pitting superstars like Dwyane Wade and LeBron James is a match made in basketball heaven where Len Bias is finally encountering his dreams of being an NBA star and Wilt Chamberlain is only getting the finest women of the world. I digress, but what we see here is a spectacular play on both sides of the ball by the Heat as we see LeBron get stuffed on a dunk and Wade…..well, you’ll just have to see.

Just watch how Varejao slams his head against the back of the support beam holding the hoop up and also how Wade steps over Varejao’s new corpse. Truly one of the greatest recent dunks we’ve seen.

divider-grey2

6. Shawn Kemp dunks on Alton Lister and let’s him know about it.

I tend to make fun of Shawn Kemp a lot because of his inability to use a condom and his ability to eat, but before that he was an amazing basketball player with the Seattle Supersonics. He was one of the most aggressive, ferocious players in the NBA of the 1990’s and he capped it off with this one play against the Golden State Warriors. Kemp and Lister had been going at it all game and I think Lister learned to respect his elder’s after this poster.

Could you imagine that happening today? There would be technical fouls and fines out the ass. Shawn Kemp didn’t care though and I’m sure he still doesn’t.

divider-grey2

5. Kevin Johnson is the nightmare in Hakeem Olajuwon’s dreams.

When I said Mourning was one of the top shot blockers, well Olajuwon is the best shot blocker. This guy was a force in Houston and opposing teams wouldn’t even think about stepping into the paint when Olajuwon was in the middle because they knew what would happen. They were going to get their shot swatted and Hakeem ‘The Dream’ was going to tally another block to his repertoire. When 6’1″ Kevin Johnson drove baseline though, no one expected this.

Purely fearless. I wonder if Johnson used this as motivation when he ran and won mayor of Sacramento?

divider-grey2

4. Kobe Bryant baptizes Dwight Howard.

That was word for word what Kobe Bryant said after he dunked on a rookie Dwight Howard and it’s true because the top shot-blocker in this league at the moment was destroyed by the top player in the league. Bryant has been known to throw down on just about anyone no matter how big they are and Howard was no exception to the Kobe Bryant rule. What is the Kobe Bryant rule you ask? Rule 1, section 1: Whoever tries to defend Mr. Bryant when he is rising for a throw down will be forced to deal with the embarrassment and ridicule of Mr. Bryant after said dunk.

Rule 8, section 4: If the dunkee has Mr. Bryant’s ball sweat on any part of him, he must deal with it on his own time.

divider-grey2

3. Julius Erving dunks on Michael Cooper and shows the NBA what a real man’s dunk is.

The dunk wasn’t revolutionary in the 1970’s and early ’80’s. It was used only in a few situations until Julius Erving came out of nowhere from the defunct ABA and showed the NBA how to really throw down. So when Michael Cooper attempted to block Dr. J’s dunk, he was quite surprised with the result when he was out of bounds and the Philadelphia 76ers were two points better.

I don’t think the NBA knew what it was getting itself into when they allowed Mr. Erving into the league. White people forever would find themselves less useful.

divider-grey2

2. Michael Jordan dunks on the city of New York.

Who hasn’t Michael Jordan dunked on? Honestly, who? Every team and every game the guy plays, someone is bound to get posterized by MJ. He dunked from the foul line, baseline, and just about everywhere else you can imagine on the floor. He even dunked from half court, well kind of.

You know you're special when Elmer Fudd just threw you an alley oop.

Back on Earth though, Michael Jordan dunked on someone who resembles one of the five defenders above, mostly the blue guy.

Poor Patrick Ewing. A great defender and a great player, but he was Michael Jordan’s bitch for the course of a decade. I can guarantee Ewing had a few words with John Starks and Charles Oakley for their shoddy defense on that play.

divider-grey2

1. Vince Carter dunks on the world.

There’s just no words to describe this. You only see this in dunk contest. This is straight up rape and it shouldn’t be allowed on this planet or even in this universe. Yet, I can’t stop looking at it. In the 2000 Olympics when the United States were rolling over every country in the world, they encountered France with a seven foot center named Frederic Weis who was patrolling the paint. He was drafted the year before into the NBA by the Knicks and was never seen in an NBA game, do you think it could be because of this?

Just exactly how does this happen? How do you jump over somebody, let alone a seven footer, in a regulation game? Don’t forget this is the best France had to offer. This is the best center of the country of France and he is getting dunked over? Yikes. That’s all there is to say.

It’s ugly and I just want to keep looking at it.

Next time you’re watching an NBA game, don’t blink because there is always the moment where something like the poster dunk can happen at any time. You just better hope that you don’t end up on the receiving ends of something like this.

The country of France still hasn’t recovered.

Comments
The Backyard: Best Of The Web