A Taste of the Olden Days: A Handset for your Cell Phone
Believe it or not, cell phones have not always been around. There are those of us who didn’t even touch one until we were like seventeen. Whippersnappers these days don’t know the pain of having to sit at home and wait for a girl to call or having your little sister listen in on your conversations. Yes, youngsters, that thing known nowadays as the “landline” was once the only phone you had, and you were glad to have it. While they do (they are still around in some homes) have drawbacks, full sized telephones did have some advantages that cell phones don’t offer. Novophone wants you to remember the good times.
The Novophone Retro Handset is a handset for cell phones that’s designed to look like part of your grandpa’s rotary phone. It comes in two varieties: those with the multi-function button, and those without it. Each is available in red and black and weighs about one pound (according to the Novophone website). It works with any cell phone with a 2.5mm jack, with adapters available for phones with a 3.5mm or proprietary jacks. The multi-function button allows you to answer or hang up a call, and, depending on your phone, allows for voice dialing and re-dialing.
Sounds good, right? But why buy a handset when you can just hold your cell phone?
Maybe all the science isn’t in on it yet, but word on the street is that heavy cell phone usage causes brain cancer. True or not, and it’s probably not, the Novophone handset will get that phone away from your head just in case. Besides that, the tried and true design may serve to improve call quality. Having the mic near your mouth instead of halfway down your cheek makes it easier for people to understand what you’re saying. And another advantage is size.
Probably the best and worst thing about a cell phone is its size. Sure you can stick it in your pocket, but what if you’re in bed trying to talk to your long distance girlfriend? Depending on how good the conversation is, you may need both of your hands for purposes besides holding your phone. You would have to squeeze that tiny cell phone between your shoulder and ear only to get a bad crick in your neck just as your girl describes what she wants to do to your fun parts. Unless you’re a real soldier about it, you may want to stop, which leaves you horny and with a pain in your neck and your girlfriend is too far away to massage. Using Novophone, however, you can comfortably hold the handset using your shoulder and get your rocks off properly.
Forgetting the practical aspects of it, though, the Novophone Retro Handset is just plain stylish. Imagine walking around campus, getting a call, and pulling the handset out of your backpack. People will stop and stare at a guy who looks like he’s talking on rotary phone while on foot.
The Novophone Retro Handset and its many adapters are available on the Novophone website. The handset itself will set you back $27.95 for both those with and without the multi-function button. The adapters cost $8.95-$12.95 based on what kind of phone you use.