Felonious musicians are great. Why waste time creating ‘musical art’ and hoping for some slither of critical acclaim when you can just load your pockets up with Class A contraband, get arrested, see your face slapped up front across news sites the world over, and coin in the publicity? Here’s five choice ditties from recent rockin’ rebels. Bonus clue: Based on his name alone, one of these guys is likely to offend again…
Rap star T.I. was sentenced in an Atlanta federal to one year and one day in prison, and ordered to pay a $100,300 fine on weapons charges related to purchasing machine guns and silencers. While waiting for sentencing he released his sixth CD, “Paper Trail,” which has sold over 2 million copies. He walked into jail reportedly worth in excess of 20 million dollars. While in Jail he received an MTV Music Award. He was released from prison to a halfway house in December, and will reportedly be released with only 500 hours of community service and probation on or about March 28, 2010.
2. Lil’ Wayne
Lil Wayne was sentenced yesterday,= and now the rapper can finally begin his one-year prison sentence. He was originally slated to be sentenced last month, but his attorney made a last-minute request to postpone the proceedings in order for Wayne to undergo dental surgery. The judge granted the request and rescheduled the proceedings for the following Tuesday, but when an unexpected fire occurred Tuesday morning at the courthouse, all afternoon cases were pushed back.
No surprises, Wayne was expected to formally enter a guilty plea to attempted gun possession after he and prosecutors reached a deal in the case in November. He will serve a one-year prison term, and it is widely believed that he could be out in as early as eight months later, assuming good behavior. The rapper was arrested in 2007 on gun charges and was facing up to 15 years in prison if convicted. The MC star is expected to turn himself in immediately after his sentencing.
Lover’s tiff Chris may be all over the news for his foxy boxing bout with umbrella girl Rhianna, but was he gentleman enough to warn her he was about to get physical? ‘Yo (Excuse Me Miss)’ may or may not hold the answers.
4. Lily Allen
Hell hath no fury like a loud-mouthed British songstress, and the gobby Ms Allen recently dispatched a flurry of punches and kicks at a group of paparazzi photographers looking to snap her coming out of her London abode. Anyone for Allen versus Brown, three rounds? Here’s the charming ‘The Fear’.
5. Uncle Murda
A rapper who at one point persuaded Jay-Z to sign him to Roc-A-Fella Records, the East New York menace was arrested at LAX for the surprisingly non-violent crime of identity fraud. Apparently he paid $500 for a fake ID, an amount that, with hindsight, would have probably been better spent on raw cocaine. Here’s his ode to being an official ‘Murdara‘.
Keeping the Cell Warm
And while we wait for the inevitable day that the above knuckleheads deprive the world of their talents while rotting in a jail cell, let us not forget.