The Girls of 2008 Olympic Beach Volleyball

Recently, we put together The Ass-Entials of Beach Volleyball, which covered the sport from a, uh, lower-angled perspective. But since then, we’ve actually watched the sport and realized it’s one of the greatest gifts to man this side of micro-brews and all-you-can eat BBQ.

So this time, we’ve gathered together all the women’s beach volleyball teams going to Beijing for the 2008 Summer Olympics into one ass-tastic round-up that’s sure to place this sport at the top of your must-see list. And not just because of the hot bikini bods–but mostly…

Check out The Girls of 2008 Olympic Beach Volleyball after the flip!

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Names: Kerri Walsh – Misty May-Treanor
Country:
United States
Rank: 1

Two of the most badass chicks in the sand, this pair won the gold for America in the 2004 Summer Olympics with 16 tournaments in a row–91 matches–completely undefeated. It is important to note that these two played against each other in HS, and that Treanor’s first name is actually Misty. Even if you don’t like volleyball and the idea of hot athletes in bikinis makes you ill, Kerri Walsh is arguably the most athletic 6 footers ever to play beach volleyball.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Tian Jia – Wang Fei
Country:
China
Rank:
2

Coming into their third Olympics since 2000, Tian Jia and Wang Fei most recently won the bronze at Berlin’s 2005 Beach Volleyball World (but you know, in German). We thought that these two made it in simply because the games were in China – that is until we went to the video tape. I have tried running on the sand before, to make it look like I was marginally healthy – wasn’t a pretty sight. These two never sink into the sand – EVER. Maybe it is because they are 40 lbs each, but either way, I haven’t seen Chinese float like that since Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Juliana Felisberta Silva – Larissa França
Country:
Brazil
Rank:
3

Generally known simply as Juliana and Larissa, this pair smacks a mean ball, beating Tain and Wang to win the silver medal at the 2005 BVW in Berlin. Plus, they are Brazilian. I mean, come on! Between Adriana Lima and Brazilian BBQ restaurants, the addition of J & L means only another check next to whatever time slot these two play in. Oh yeah, they are pretty good at volleyball too. For those of you who enjoy junk in the trunk – check out
those stretch marks – WOW!!!

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Xue Chen – Zhang Xi
Country:
China
Rank: 4

After a childhood filled only with volleyball, this pair started with a bang in 2006 after winning the Asian Games. Beijing will be their first Olympics. It is important to note, that these two are freaks. Take every 80’s movie you ever saw about how Russia used to train athletes from birth. Now remove the random white faces, and insert these two. All they know is volleyball, and if they don’t win they will probably be scrubbing western toilets in Beijing until they die. You want to see 2 players fight for their lives, watch ANY match they are in. You almost start to feel guilty for watching. The desperation is pretty apparent.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Nicole Branagh – Elaine Youngs
Country:
United States
Rank:
5

An alumni of the University of Minnesota, Nicole won bronze at the 2003 Pan American Games and partnered with Holly McPeak in the 2004 Summer Games. Elaine too partnered with McPeak in 2004, winning bronze. They are the Scottie Pippen to Walsh/Treanor’s Michael Jordan. We have them pegged for a bronze (at best), but with the level of competition in these games, don’t be horribly shocked if they get blanked from the semi-finals. If you are an underdog lover and can’t bring yourself to root for the Iranian beach volleyball team (I hear they shaved for these games!), make sure you catch these ladies hit the sand. If at the very least, for the fetish guys out there, please enjoy the swamp-a** shot.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Talita Antunes – Renata Ribiero
Country:
Brazil
Rank: 6

First partnering in the 2002 Challenger Banco do Brasil in Natal and they were runners-up in the games held in Rio and Recife. After a brief split, the two rejoined in 2005 when Talita won FIVB rookie of the year award. We obviously have a thing for Brazilian chicks, but these two make trudging through the sand look so graceful, it looks easy. Even when compared to other teams, one would think these two lived in the sand.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Vasso Karantasiou – Vassiliki Arvaniti
Country:
Greece
Rank: 7

Vassiliki Arvanitti, who took gold at the 2005 European Championships in Moscow and competed in the 2004 Games, is now partnering with 2005 top player, Vasso Karantasiou to represent Greece in Beijing. Yassoo Baby! These two little Spartans FLY all over the field. They will dive for sh** they don’t even have to. It makes the match entertaining to watch, but by the second match you will see them start to bandage themselves up to the point that, by match 3 they will look bundled up for the winter games.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Sara Goller – Laura Ludwig
Country:
Germany
Rank: 8

Not only is this pair hot, they’re good. In 2006, they won the German Championships, U23 European Championships and ended fourth in the European Championships. By 2007, they were first place in Germany and seventh overall. Crazy hot German love, is not only the top searched phrase for porn – but it is the best description for the love we have for these ladies. They are up for medal favorites, but if there is a God, there will definitely be a German wardrobe malfunction. They wear so little, it’s bound to happen. I would even be willing to settle for a nipple slip.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Stephanie Pohl – Okka Rau
Country:
Germany
Rank:
9

These German heavy-hitters know their way around the sand. In 2003, Stephanie took silver and Okka gold at the European Championships, and both represented Germany in the 2004 Summer Olympics. They may not have any Olympic gold around their necks yet. But this pair brings some of the highest-energy play to the game, never letting their opponents slack off for even a second. Because of this, they are always a good team to bet on. And a better team to watch—what’s nicer than a pair of tight bods giving it all they’ve got?

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Natalie Cook – Tasmin Barnett
Country:
Australia
Rank:
10

Cook first hit the Olympic scene in the 1996 Summer Olympic Games in Atlanta and represented Australia with partner Kerri Pottharst at Sydney in 2000. Tasmin joined them on the Austrailian team in the Sydney Games and was Australia’s player of the Year in 2002. Beijin 2008 will be the first Olympics for Cook and Barnett as partners, but that doesn’t mean they’re going to suck. From serious saves to powerhouse serves, this pair brings that little bit extra to the sand. Make sure to TiVo any match with this Aussie pair—they’re not in the top 10 for nothing.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Nila Hakedal – Ingrid Torlen
Country: Norway
Rank:
11

Hakedal the hottie started playing volleyball at the age of 13, and moved to Oslo in 1999 to play for the Koll volleyball club and to study. And blonde Ingrid’s toned and powerful style brings a vicious game to the court. Partnered since 2002, the pair competed in the 2004 Summer Olympics in Athens, representing Norway and super hotness all the way.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Katherine Maaseide – Susanne Glesnes
Country:
Norway
Rank:
12

This smokin’ two-some won the pair’s silver medal at the 2004 European
Championship, beating out 9th place Pohl and Rau, and represented Norway in the 2004 Summer Olympics. With a no-holds-barred hustle that rivals Snoop Dogg on PCP, the young team can’t be counted out of the running. They might be a long shot, but we’re guessing you’ll at least get to see a handful of sexy sun-dressed sports.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Name: Dalixia Fernandez Grasset-Larrea Peraza
Country:
Cuba
Rank:
13

Most notably winning gold in the 2003 Pan American Games, this pair will be
flying the Cuban flag for the third consecutive Olympic Games, this year in Beijing. They say it might be hard for the Olympic athletes in the restrictive land, but this pair is so used to repressive governments, they’ll know all the tricks. We’re not saying they’re bad, but if these sultry Cubans win, I’d start looking for who they paid off.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Doris Schwaiger – Stephanie Schwaiger
Country: Austria
Rank:
14

This sister duo has been going strong since 2001 with their biggest win in 2006, a third place finish at the U32 Championship and seventh in the world ranking at their World Tour appearances in Modena and Warsaw. You can never count out Eastern Europeans—they live and breath the sport from the time they are removed from the teat. So don’t be surprised when these two are standing with medals around their necks.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Liesbeth Van Breedam – Liesbeth Mouha
Country:
Belgium
Rank:
15

There’s not much info on these women (in English). But we do know that as strange as the name “Liesbeth” is (at least outside Belgium), having two smoking hot volleyball players on the same team with that name, and it just has to be something special. And if their volleyball is as good as their waffles (which it is), then get ready for the most delicious games ever to hit the sand.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Esteves Ribalta – Milagros Crespo
Country:
Cuba
Rank:
16

If we spoke Spanish, we’d probably say that these Cuban cuties are f**king sick at volleyball, and they could play the best of them with a good chance of getting a lucky break. But we don’t speak Spanish, so we’re just going to sit back and enjoy the view. They are ranked 16th in the entire world, so it’s not like they could suck, right?

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Name: Thalia Koutroumanidou – Maria Tsiartsiani
Country:
Greece
Rank: 17

This powerhouse pair comes into Beijin with multiple medal wins in FIVB tours and championships, and consistently land in the top 10 at tournaments. But their real secret is their enthusiasm. “My sport is exciting. It requires utmost physical strength, a strong personality, ball technique, and a lot of thinking,” says Maria. On the other hand, Thalia plays with a cool demeanor and collected style. Between the two of them, the rest of this list better watch their backs. (And so will we.)

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Natalya Uryadova – Alexandra Shiryaeva
Country:
Russia
Rank: 18

These Slavic smokeshows come into the 2008 Games with a gold medal win at the 2006 European Championships. While they haven’t brought in a top three slot in the past couple of years, they precision style and keen play keep them in the running to score some major points in Beijing. So keep your eyes on this pair, and not just on their asses.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Rebekka Kadijk – Merel Mooren
Country:
Netherlands
Rank: 19

This Dutch duo have been practically unbeatable in their own country, winning the Dutch Championships in 2005 and 2006, also earning silvers in the European Championships both years. They finally won their gold in the 2007 European Championships, and now they have their eyes set on the Olympic podium. With bright smiles and strong ball-play (stop it, you perv), this team comes into Beijing with a good chance of upsetting the competition. But we won’t be upset to see more of these two.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Name: Sara Montagnolli – Sabine Swoboda
Country:
Austria
Rank: 20

Forming their team in 2004, this young team won the Buenos Aires Championship and placed seventh in the 2006 European Championships, making them one of the hottest teams to watch at the Olympic Summer Games. However, because of their relative rookie status, anything could happen. And when I say “anything,” I’m hoping that means the two of them tackle each other in the sand like a couple of sex-craved animals. Wait, did I say that outloud? Uh…I gotta go…

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Bibiana Candelas – Mayra Garcia
Country:
Mexico
Rank:
21

Coming into the 2008 Games, Garcia brings a second place finish in the 2003 Pan American Championships, while Candelas rocked the court during her time at the University of Southern California, going All-American three years in the row and finishing her college career with the second-highest score of all time. This will be the pair’s first Olympics, but with skills like these, all they need is a little luck to send them to the top.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Mika Teru Saiki – Chiaki Kusuhara
Country:
Japan
Rank:
22

Pairing up for the 2008 Games in Beijin, this pair has blazed across the FIVB circuit with multiple medal finishes. Though tall compared to most people from the Land of the Rising Sun, this pair’s overall biggest weakness is height when going against some of the taller teams. But don’t think that’s going to stop them from giving it their best—they bring with them the vigor of a 1000-people orgy and the stamina of Ron Jeremy. Between the two, we expect some good rounds of volleyball, and some nice views in the process.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Names: Cristine “Saka” Santanna – Andrezza “Rtvelo” Martins das Chagas
Country:
Georgia
Rank: 23

These dual nationals (Brazil and Georgia) start the 2008 Summer Olympics with more than 30 tournaments under their bikinis, and have consistently finished in the FIVB top 10. While they stand long-shots against some of the higher ranked teams, this pair can work the sand with ease, and their experience will serve them well as they try to top higher scoring contenders. But even if they fail to make the podium in Beijing, you’ll be happy you got to watch them do it!

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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Name: Judith Augoustides – Vitalila Nel
Country:
South Africa
Rank:
24

Wife of SWATCH-FIVB men’s player Casey Augoustides, Judith has numerous fourth-place wins in her career, but is gunning for gold in Beijing this year with her partner Vitalila Nel, a relative rookie. It’s anyone’s guess how well this team will fare in Beijing this year, but if they’re like everyone else from South Africa, it’s going to take a hell of a lot to take down these two tough chicks. And despite their ranking coming into this year’s Summer Games, expect them to exceed your expectations—that’s all we’re sayin’.

[Click the photo to view the full gallery]

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